Mid-Week Comments
As my beloved printer prints page after page of last-minute homework, I began to think about my life, and what it’s all about. Obviously, self-preservation and pursuing happiness are a large part of it, but what does it all have to do with my life? Right now I’m concerned mainly with securing for myself a future, where? At yet another school. Of course, this will be a university, and a good, serious, academic university, which is for some reason commonly known as “Wazzu.” Four years of communal showers and hating the Huskies, for what? Of course I know for what–so I can live a productive life, which is an admirable end in itself. Ayn Rand said that happiness was the state of consciousness that arrives from achieving your values, and that man’s own happiness is the moral purpose of his life. And how do you achieve what you value? Why, by producing, and living off the fruits of your own labor, or what you trade them for. And I’ll produce more with a college education, so the four years of communal showers and hating the Huskies will make me happier in the end.
No, that’s not the real reason. It’s because of my wishful thinking about girls at WSU, and the probability that one who satisfies my basic desires over there would be willing to go out with me.
It’s a combination of both. I want to live the life too. I want independence. In college. Of course, I’ll be living and studying off of money that isn’t mine, at least until I start working over there. Then I’ll be living and studying off of money that is mine. But it’s still independence.
But until that day in late August, I’m still here. And until June 13, at 7 AM (I think), I’m a high school student. Which means more mornings spent chatting with my dorky friend Jon. More exciting discussions in Contemp about stuff. More in-class essays in KJ’s class, and more discussions about the unending search for biblical references in works of literature. More dull labs in Chem, interspersed into fascinating lectures. More time spent getting free fashion advice from April, who has convinced me to stop wearing glasses and to let my cell phone out of its leather case. More boring lunches. More walking up the hill, down the hill, up the hill again. More days studying Geology and German.
Today, I didn’t wear my glasses. The frames are bent. I bend them back into shape, but they bend back out. I might get them replaced, but I’m happy not wearing them. April says I look “more human” without them. Of course, she was shocked to hear I only wore them to look smarter. I’m 20/20 in one eye and 20/25 in the other, after all. I don’t need them, but I do wear them.
I just consolidated all my stuff into 2 binders. I could fit it into 1, but it wouldn’t be worth it. It’s nice losing weight, off my backpack at least. Losing weight off my body wouldn’t be a bad thing, since I’m 209 pounds at last measurement, but I’m comfortable with my body. I don’t feel insecure about it. Then again, I’m not supposed to, I’m male.
I wish I had played at least one sport during high school. Lacrosse would have been a good choice. Running into other people and hitting them with sticks appeals to me. But I’m kind of weak, and I don’t stay in good shape. I need to start doing that anyway.
Well, I’m gonna go now. I’ll blog to you all later. I have Friday off from school, so I might blog on Thursday night. Who knows though. Until then, I’m wearing high-friction pants!
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