sheer potentiality

I just read perhaps the stupidest argument ever in favor of cable companies not including the NFL Network in their basic cable packages:

Cable companies are also used to having their way — not because they are liked but because, as insulated quasi-monopolies, they don’t see much advantage in being liked. In this particular dispute, however, they happen to be right. They’re saving millions of non-fans from an attempt by the NFL to pick their pockets.The reason the NFL Network is not on most cable systems is the league’s arrogance. It won’t let the cable companies put its channel on a premium tier, where the fans who want it would pay the NFL’s premium price. The network insists that it be included in a basic package, which spreads the costs to all customers, including those who don’t care a whit for football.The NFL wants an average of 80 cents per cable subscriber per month, according to media consulting firm SNL Kagan, making it the fifth most expensive cable channel among 159. Even to the NFL’s fans, that price might seem high for a network that provides about 24 hours per year of live NFL football and about 8,736 hours of filler. For people whose idea of good TV is cooking shows, it must seem downright insane.

Source.Of course, what isn’t mentioned (but what is shown in their graph) is that ESPN and FSN (Fox Sports Network) are the #1 and #2 most expensive channels available, so evidently sports programming (including ESPN’s Monday Night Football) is also “picking the pockets” of cooking-show fans. And TNT, for no good reason at all, is third.But the main flaw with this argument is that it ignores how cable television works in the first place. Here’s a list of the cable channels I can easily get here in Pullman:2 KREM 2 Spokane WA3 KLEW 3 Lewiston ID4 KXLY 4 Spokane WA5 QVC6 KHQ 6 Spokane WA7 KSPS 7 Spokane WA8 Public Access10 KWSU 10 Pullman WA11 Local Bulletin Board12 KUID 12 Moscow ID13 Government Access14 KGPX 34 Spokane WA15 KSKN 22 Spokane WA (CW)16 Educational Access17 KXMN18 KQUP 24 Pullman WA19 HSN20 TV Guide Channel21 CSPAN22 CSPAN 223 The Disney Channel (West)24 ESPN25 ESPN226 Fox Sports Northwest27 CNN28 USA Network (West)29 Discovery Channel (West)30 Nickelodeon (West)31 ABC Family Channel (West)32 AMC - American Movie Classics (West)33 A&E (West)34 CNN Headline News35 The Weather Channel36 VH1 (West)37 MTV: Music Television (West)38 TNT - Turner Network Television (West)39 Comedy Central (West)40 Spike TV (West)41 E! Entertainment Television (West)42 Sci Fi Channel (West)43 Fox News Channel44 CNBC45 TLC - The Learning Channel (West)46 Cartoon Network (West)47 CMT - Country Music Television (West)48 Northwest Cable News49 Animal Planet50 TV Land (West)51 Court TV (West)52 Travel Channel53 The History Channel (West)54 FX55 Bravo56 TBS Superstation57 HGTV - Home & Garden Television58 Lifetime Television59 Hallmark Channel60 Shop NBC61 Food Network62 Inspiration/EWTN63 MSNBC64 Oxygen65 BET - Black Entertainment Television66 MTV270 College Sports TVNow, since I’m a non-Christian white male, about four of these channels are of no interest to me right off the bat. Let’s take out Lifetime, Inspiration/EWTN, Oxygen, and BET. MTV is a waste of time lately so let’s take out both of their channels. I don’t have any children so the Disney channel can go (Cartoon Network stays because of Adult Swim). Nickelodeon is questionable, because the only two shows Nick at Nite still have that I would want to watch are The Cosby Show and Home Improvement. But let’s keep it anyway. I certainly don’t want to buy things from TV shows, so Shop NBC, HSN, and QVC are out. Fox News is out because I’m not interested in right-wing propaganda. All, told, of all those channels, here are all the ones that would “pick my pockets”:5 QVC19 HSN23 The Disney Channel (West)31 ABC Family Channel (West)36 VH1 (West)37 MTV: Music Television (West)41 E! Entertainment Television (West)43 Fox News Channel44 CNBC47 CMT - Country Music Television (West)51 Court TV (West)54 FX55 Bravo56 TBS Superstation57 HGTV - Home & Garden Television58 Lifetime Television59 Hallmark Channel60 Shop NBC62 Inspiration/EWTN63 MSNBC64 Oxygen65 BET - Black Entertainment Television66 MTV2Even worse, the channels that remain are clogged with ads 1/3 of the time during normal programming (a 30-minute program is slightly over 20 minutes in length, an hour program is in reality slightly more than 40 minutes), and all of the time at night. (Home shopping channels are by definition clogged with ads 24/7, and I’m not entirely sure why people even watch them. Honestly I would have more fun watching Ron Popeil infomercials than that dreck.) And half of the channels I am selecting, I’m only choosing for specific circumstances. I get all my news from the Internet—CNN is only valuable to me in rare circumstances, and the only thing I would really miss from losing a channel like CNN is being able to watch live coverage when something like 9/11 happens. SciFi is only valuable because of Battlestar Galactica. Spike is generally useful only for Star Trek reruns.The problem here is not with a greedy NFL. The problem is with the cable TV system. Am I really supposed to believe that there are fewer NFL fans in this country than criminal justice system fans?

My friend Wes posted a particularly well written piece about his school’s women’s lacrosse team, which is going to the national championship game against Duke. Not content enough to shove our faces in the implication that His University Is Better Than Ours Because It’s A Serious Academic University, As Evidenced By Its Horrid Athletic Program, he even resorts to outright race-baiting:

Until our women’s lacrosse team went on its wild streak in ‘05 our strongest sports teams were the very clubbiest of white-people sports, tennis and golf.

In contrast, I present to you a Wikipedia article about the best golfer of our times, as well as not only one tennis champion, but yet another tennis champion! Clearly, Wes’s horrid race-card move is a sadly outdated relic of the early 1990’s and other sad times when successful black athletes were limited to nearly every other popular spectator sport.

In all seriousness, Wes is a great guy. I just wanted to play the demented, outraged right-wing blogger for once.

Hey everyone! Looks like I haven’t blogged to you since the regular season, and now there’s only four teams that can make it to the Super Bowl: the loathsome Bucs, the excellent Eagles, the dynamic Raiders, and the consistent Titans. Right now, I’m gonna predict that the Raiders will beat the Bucs in the Super Bowl. The Raiders are a very good team, and their offense can smash any defense, even Tampa Bay. Tampa Bay and Philadelphia this week seem to be a rather even matchup, so it should be a good game.

Outside of football, the end of the semester is near. Semester finals for the last time in high school abound, as do my imminent driver’s license. (Yes, I’m 17. It’s a long story.)

On the website front, philwelch.net has been “refreshed”. There’s a little something new on each page. I encourage you to check it all out.

Personal news: I have good news. I’ve been accepted to Washington State University! I’m very happy about this, so if there’s anyone reading this from Pullman, you’ll see me this fall.

Finally, for our special Friday Feature, here’s some remarks:

Gina: I have a hereditary crack in my front tooth.
Wes: “Neque porro quisquam est qui dolorem ipsum quia dolor sit amet, consectetur, adipisci velit…” (”There is no one who loves pain itself, who seeks after it and wants to have it, simply because it is pain.”) –Cicero, _de Finibus Bonorum et Malorum_
Wes: At any rate, it’s Cicero, Phil.

My prediction for the Apple Cup was 24-21 Washington State. Instead, it was 29-26 Washington. The Huskies won the game in triple overtime by recovering a fumbled backward pass by Kegel.

That’s right. Kegel. Some junior who happens to be the backup quarterback. He was in because Jason Gesser, the finest quarterback the Washington State Cougars have ever had, was sacked and injured.

I’m not bitter about it. Just disapppointed. I really wanted to see WSU go to the Rose Bowl, but that won’t happen this year. The Huskies won fair and square. Though I am comforted by the thought that there was only one thing that allowed the Huskies to win, and that was the injury to Jason Gesser. WSU could have still won the game without him, but if Gesser was still in, the game would have been won by the Washington State Cougars. There is no doubt in my mind that that is what would have happened.

Oh well. There’s still the Green Bay Packers.